Why be sweet, why be careful, why be kind?
A man has only one thing on his mind
Why ask politely, why go lightly,
Why say please?
They only want to get you on your knees
There are a few things I never could believe
A woman when she weeps
A merchant when he swears
A thief who says he'll pay
A lawyer when he cares
A snake when he is sleeping
A drunkard when he prays
I don't believe you go to heaven
When you're good
Everything goes to hell, anyway...

- Tom Waits